“We spend much of our lives going about completely blind to reality, and yet we still have the gall to act victimized when it invariably catches up to us。” – Nenia Campbell

“我们完全不顾生活现实白白浪费了很多生命时光，既然避免不了要面对现实生活，那么我们仍要有胆量来面对。”——作家奈尼尔-坎贝尔

1. You cannot always rely on friends

你不可能一直靠朋友帮忙

You will need certain life skills when nobody else is around. In this way you can rely on yourself to get out of trouble. It is a sad fact of life that we cannot count on other people most of the time. Make sure you have the following skills:

在你周围没人可以依靠的日子里，那就需要你掌握一定的生活技能，这样你可以靠自己走出困境。大部分时间我们无法指望别人，这个悲哀的生活事实是我们要面对的。你要保证自己掌握以下技能：

You can cook

会做饭

You can drive

会开车

You know about the power switches in your home

知道你家里电源开关的位置

You have a spare set of keys in a secret place for when you get locked out

有一套备用钥匙放在隐秘地方以备自己锁在外面时用

You can manage your time

自己把握好时间

You learn something new about information technology every day to become computerate。

每天学习一些新的信息技术丰富自己的电脑知识

2. Make time for your passion

找时间去做自己爱做的事情

Whatever you love doing, make sure you do it at a set time. This is important because you find that friends, family, your boss, and your pet will be constantly yapping at your heels trying to steal your time. You have to build in the following defense mechanisms to stop people making unreasonable demands at the wrong moment:

无论你喜欢做什么，都要保证你在自己设定的时间内做完。这一点很重要，因为你会发现你的朋友、你的家庭、你的老板、跟在你身后朝你叫个不停的宠物都在窃取着你的宝贵时间。你必须建立以下防御机制来阻止人们在错误的时刻做出不合理的要求：

Switch off your phone

关掉电话

Turn off the computer

关掉电脑

Go out and do it or lock yourself in

出门去做，或是把自己关在家里

Leave Post-its to remind these intruders. (Yes, I know your pet can’t read but the others can!)

记在便利贴上提醒那些干扰你的人(是，我知道你的宠物看不懂但别人能看懂!)

3. You accept challenges

你要接受挑战

In order to grow in being sociable, stronger both physically and mentally, you have to accept challenges on a regular basis. You are pushing yourself to get better and stronger。

为了增强社交能力，身心都要锻炼得更加坚强，你要定期接受挑战。你把自己变得更优秀更坚强。

4. You like being alone but you are not a loner

你喜欢独自一人，但你不是一个孤独的人

“If you’re lonely when you’re alone, you’re in bad company。” – Jean-Paul Sartre

“如果你独自一人时感到孤独，就说明你没有把自己陪好。”——约翰-保罗萨特

It is impossible to exist without social contact. You can be as strong and self-sufficient as you like, but at the end of the day you need to interact in a real, personal and meaningful way, which is neither Facebook nor Twitter. You need to be in contact with real people for this。

不可能不与社会接触。你可以让自己变得像你想象的那样坚强和自信，结束一天的工作，但在工作之余你需要与现实生活中的个人进行这有意义的互动，不要生活在脸书和推特的虚拟世界中。你要与真实的人接触交流。

At the same time, you can enjoy quiet time alone and you are comfortable with that. The health benefits range from increased creativity, less depression and improved memory。

同时，你可以享受安静的独处时光，会让你很舒服。对健康也有增加创造力、减少抑郁、改善记忆的益处。

5. Lower your expectations

降低你的期望值

“I’m not in this world to live up to your expectations and you’re not in this world to live up to mine。” – Bruce Lee

“我活着不是为了满足你的期望，就像你也不是因为我的期望而活着一样。”——李小龙

Don’t think that people will always be there when you fall or fail. The phone will go silent. Many friends will suddenly be very busy with their own problems。

在你人生不得意或失意之时，不要认为总有人会围着你转。你的电话不再响起，你曾经的很多朋友很突然地都在各忙各的。

6. Prepare for bad times

为不得意的日子做好准备

Stuff happens and it can get nasty! You will have to learn to be stronger and not give up. But the good news is that adversity and suffering will make you appreciate life afterwards. Those who endured hardships, like being homeless, divorced or ill, found that they been able to develop better coping strategies and were more socially active。

不得意的人生遭遇的确令人不悦，你要学会坚强不放弃。但好在遭遇逆境和磨难之后，会让你对生活满怀感激之情。像无家可归的人、离婚的人或生病的人，这些历经艰难困苦的人能够找出更好的应对策略并积极参与社交活动。

“Hope for the best and cope with the rest。” – Anon “

满怀最美好的希望，谋事在人成事在天。” ——无名氏